With UKIP on the Verge of Collapse, Nigel Farage May Be Set for a Comeback

Today has been a fun day for UKIP watchers, with the party's national executive committee voting unanimously for a no-confidence motion in the leader, Henry Bolton.

How this came about is due to some texts that Jo Marney, Henry's admittedly rather delightful mistress sent which criticised Prince Harry's choice of an American bride. 

Those texts were leaked by Annabelle Fuller, the former mistress of the former leader, Nigel Farage. So the current lover of the current UKIP leader was done over by the former lover of the former leader - are you with me as far as we've come?

Jolly good! Now then, the rumour has it that Farage knew about this plot and has plans of his own to set up a UKIP Mark Two if Bolton resigns. The point is that UKIP is on its beam-end financially and cannot even afford to pay its leader a salary, so another leadership election is pretty much out of the question. Thus if UKIP does fold there will be a space on the political spectrum for a hard Brexit outfit that is not made up of anally retentive cardigan wearers who all seem to be married to women with cruel perms.

The idea would be to have a movement that is directed centrally with local associations that do as they are told, a set-up that is obviously based on the one used by the Conservatives. If it becomes popular then it may morph into a political party that would run candidates, but their selection would be kept out of the hands of the cardigan wearers.

Nigel Farage would be the president, with Arron Banks the chairman and cheque signer. Richard Tice of Leave Means Leave is also being tipped for a senior role. All in all, the idea is to have a centrally controlled organisation where the fruitcakes and loonies are expected to cheer the policies that emerge from the central committee's deliberations. Those deliberations would be aided by focus groups a la New Labour under Tony Blair.

UKIP probably should have shut up shop after the referendum victory as their reason to exist came to an end. That the debate is now between hard and soft Brexit is also clear, so the need for a pressure group that will push for the hardcore version is also pretty obvious. 

That said, given the utter chaos that is British politics today, quite where all this will end up is anyone's guess.